Twilight Character Career Musings
This post was inspired by Twilight Series Theories Occupation Speculation? post. Listed below are the careers I envision for the Twilight cast of characters.
Carlisile: When he tired of doctoring, he decided to try his hand at acting. He died his hair brown and was happy to discover Hollywood make-up techniques to hide his deathly pallor. Currently starring in Nurse Jackie as Dr. Cooper.
Esme: Preacher. Founder of Motherism – a matriarchal religion based on the tenets of equality and social justice. Champion of female vampire rights and advocate for no-fault vampire divorce.
Bella: Author. Latest book: Surviving Vampire Culture, or, How I Learned to Balk the Patriarchy. Founder of Vampire Addicts Anonymous.
Edward: Filmmaker. Latest film: Vampires and Masculinity, or, How To be a New Man when You are a Very Old Vampire.
Jacob: Owner of Jake’s Motorcyles for Daring Girls.
Alice: Fashion journalist. Famous for predicting future fashion trends. She recently forecast that the woolfy shoes pictured below would be a big hit with the Team Jacob set.
Jasper: Bouncer. He’s got the right facial expressions for it. And he could lighten the mood when a barroom brawl is about to begin.
Rosalie: Supermodel. Also serves as host for “American’s Next Vampire Model.”
Emmett: Professional Football Player.
Renesmee: Professor of Vampire Studies.
Leah: Reproductive choice counselor. Active in the reproductive justice movement. Member of NARAL and regular speaker for Feminists for Choice.
Seth: Politician. Supports werewolf rights, same-sex marriage, and equal pay.
Mike: Actor. Starring role in the remake of Fluke.
Eric: Editorial Cartoonist. Focuses in particular on critiquing Asian stereotypes and US racism.
Angela: Psychologist. Works with individuals dangerously addicted to love and romance.
Jessica: Vampire/werewolf divorce lawyer and rape counselor.